What Should I Do To Marry A Rich Guy??

Posted on a popular forum and faithfully being reproduced here...


What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden (?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I've
met a few girls who doesn't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty


Awesome reply:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money": Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position". If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same
goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased". Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do contact me…

signed,
J.P Morgan

A Temple Visit

As many would know this is the mandala kaalam or the auspicious month for Lord Iyyappa worship. Sharing a few photos from the temple visit, instead of waxing eloquent...




One portion of the divine palki getting ready. If you notice carefully the entire palki is made from just banana stem and fresh coconut leaves. Talk about being environment friendly!


The decorated temple elephant swaying its ears gently to the music of the chenda made an awesome sight.





There was also a program of Thayambaka and Panchavadyam organized for the evening which we had to give a miss due to the unusually cold weather.





For those who would like to hear the chenda, found this youtube link -

So, what am I up to?

No, I don't have delusions that there are actually people out there who are wee bit interested to read or know about my activities, but thats the kick a blog with a few clicks gives you. You simply imagine an interested audience, assume a readership base and go about expending your ideas & thoughts to the extent that now I feel compelled to state the reasons for my periodic inactiveness.
Duh, actually acknowledging that in words has weaned away some of the enthusiasm with which I started this post.

Albeit, to grudgingly continue, I am brushing up on my Spanish.Am still trying to figure out the 'Estar' & 'Ser' but to prove a point, here I go -

Hola a todos,
A mi me gusta bailar. Mi primer baile es en Julio. Practico mucho. Mi maestra canta para mi. Evito la lluvia porque estoy enferma. Nosotros percibemos baile divino.

Hope I have impressed those who see the above lines as gibberish. To those who understand it and with shrinking foreheads - ahem! I told you I am yet a learner, yaar.

And in between my pretensions of learning español, I manage to give an earful to all those cheats out there. Believe me there are quite a handful of corporate rogues out there. Honestly am not the one who likes to keep cribbing and crying hoarse over daily woes but these people are simply pushing me to a corner.

HDFC Chubb General Insurance for instance. I renewed my car insurance in the month of October and was issued a cover note. Its over 2 months now, my cheque has been realised and I am yet to get the original insurance copy. Every time I have called their customer care person I have to repeat my entier story. The person I last spoke to seems untraceable despite having the customer service officer's name or time when I last spoke. Needless to say, all I get is shallow promises of 'immediate followup'. And this despite being their loyal customer for 3 years!
[Moreover I learn from my husband that the cover note has only a 2 month validity and I dazedly recollect that I had made through the entire last year happily with only an insurance cover note.]

Next in line is Citibank. I have an ERA account which I have not operated for over a year. Now that I have ample time on hand I decided on sorting my bank accounts, finances and having decided so, I called them to issue me a new ATM pin. Simple task? You think! They say my ERA is not associated with my debit card so I can't do a simple validation over the phone. So next I write a letter and courier it to their Chennai office.
After a week I call for the pin and they say - "Can you write to us again, we have not received your letter."
I say, "I had it couriered to your office and I have the DTDC docket no. How can you simply state that a customer correspondence is untraceable? She repeats: "Can you write to us again, we have not received your letter."
I ask her - "Can you guarantee me that this time you will get the letter? She simply parrots the same line : "Can you write to us again ma'am, we have not received any letter."
I give up. Afterall what are a few hundreds in front of my mental well-being?

But Bimal Auto Agency takes the cake! I give my Alto for a complete service and after a lot of nakhra their guy picks the car a day before the service. I forget to note the kilometers run before handing over the keys but let me pass that. I get a call the next day stating the various cleaning and maintenance work they plan to do. I meekly ok it all and also agree to the astronomical figure they state as the estimation. End of the day am all happy with my shiny new looking machine and generously tip the driver also. All fine till now.

Next day I read an advertisement in paper that Maruti and all their associated agencies have been running this "Car Repair/Maintenance Month" and that all services/spares come at some 30% discount and free car wash coupons etc. What? Why wasn't I even told anything of this? I call them up frantically, fumble words in anger and question them as to why I was not mentioned about this on-going service mela or whatever yesterday while I coughed up the full charge?
The lady hems-haws and says something about how I should have mentioned that I was giving the car for service under that scheme or whatever. What??! But &*%#%^&*(
She has better things to do obviously than placate angry customers who are at loss of words.I raise a few decibels, tell her how she has lost a valuable customer who would have otherwise given our Maruti Swift also for a service but who wouldn't ever do it now. She could'nt have cared less for she simply 'thanks' me and puts the receiver down!

I end up feeling like a complete moron who has paid for a free ride.

Will seek some solace in a lime mousse cheesecake...you take care.

The Art of Fine Insult!

One forward mail that I really enjoyed, so sharing them here...

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
-- Winston Churchill
[Applies to many people I know]

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -- Clarence Darrow
[Oops! I dont exactly have a list, though...]

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." -- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
[Hahah can 100% apply to me but I would like to think of it as a compliment. I wonder what Faulkner would have to say about our very own R K Narayan.]

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -- Groucho Marx
[Me yet hankering after 'that' perfectly wonderful evening]

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." -- Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -- Oscar Wilde
[Ouch! that should hurt]

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... If you have one." -- George Bernard Shaw to .Winston Churchill, followed by Churchill's response: "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one." -- Winston Churchill
[One classy retort this is...]

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -- Stephen Bishop
[Hmm slightly confusing]

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -- Irvin S. Cobb
[Hehah simply fantastic]

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -- Samuel Johnson
[Cool one. Would like to use it one day]

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -- Mae West
[Many names crop up ;) ]

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." --- Oscar Wilde
[I agree Mr Wilde, I agree wholeheartedly. Makes one think about the relatives you might have had too..]

Lady Astor once remarked to Winston Churchill at a Dinner Party, "Winston, if you were my husband, I would poison your coffee!"
Winston replied, "Madam if I were your husband I would drink it!"
[Ahem! a made-(to remain)in-heaven match]

"We've been through so much together, and most of it was your fault." --- Ashleigh Brilliant
[The name says it all]

"This is not a book that should be tossed lightly aside. It should be hurled with great force." --- Dorothy Parker
[I have such a list! Will write another post on that.]

Street Artists: A dying breed.

Yesterday I wokeup to the loud notes of nadaswaram - a wind instrument, similar to the shehnai of the North India. A little miffed at being so wokenup instead of my usual favourite FM, I walked out to see my mom generously giving alms to this person towing a decorated cow. Mom smiled seeing grumpy face, squinting at the early morning blasts of sun.

"Nadaswaram is a mangala vadhyam (auspicious instrument) dear" she smiled. "Traditionally you must have seen them in south-indian marriages or street processions but they started out as divine instruments used in temple worship. There were times when people used to flock for nadaswaram concerts and these musicians were a celebrated lot. Today see what they have been reduced to" she lamented.

Did a little reading on this endangered art form and came out understanding little more of them. I made a small vow to myself that the next time I come across such street artists, will spare them more than a few loose change.

Of Sabbaticals, Domestic Bliss & Homing Pigeons.....

I have written and deleted about nine versions of this post. Half the time wondering if I am really expressing what I am actually feeling. I also had this nagging thought that the moment I would put this in words my feelings might take a 360 degree turn. Am being a braveheart by going ahead and posting this, so don't you judge me.

'Domestic bliss' was a term I used to associate as a brand for selling modular kitchens at the most. Today on a short sabbatical I seem to find myself wallowing in this very same bliss of plain vanilla domesticity - and am actually enjoying it. Looking back as far as I can see I have never given myself the luxury of taking a break for more than 2 weeks. And those precious breaks used to be mainly while I was transitioning from one company to another.Today its more than 2 months of me waking up without having to wonder "What do I wear to office today?" and its simply exhilarating.

I used to find it rather condescending when people used to point out the long history of women's natural association with the home and domesticity. But perhaps its just the modern social conditioning that equates feminine domesticity to shameful captivity by the patriarchial society that we live in. I could never imagine why any woman worth her salt would want to regress to the era of being a homing pigeon, slaving it out in the kitchen and keeping the table spotless.

Today am amused to find myself secretly enjoying the very same things I used to shoo away from. Make no mistake, the thought of getting to confined to the coffee pot and knitting skeins of wool into dull socks and sweaters still nauseates me.

Its this new found domesticity that has me shamelessly enslaved - where I get an hour long morning seista of coffee and the paper, hearty unhurried breakfast, no more weaving your way through the traffic and no more worry of missed deadlines. Absolutely revelling in it..

More later....got to go wave my hubby 'bye' :)

Shubh Deepavali

Wishing a happy, prosperous and safe Diwali to one and all.




Glittering MG Road on Diwali night