Thursday, July 30, 2026

When Life Comes Full Circle

No one really prepares you for the quiet heartbreak of watching your parents grow old.

As children, we believe they are invincible. They are the ones who always know what to do. They carry the family through every storm, make difficult decisions look effortless, and somehow find the strength to be everyone else's anchor.

My Amma has always been that person for me.

She stood by me through every phase of my life. She celebrated my victories, comforted me through disappointments, welcomed my husband into our family, and was there to witness the birth of my children. She helped raise them with the same patience and love she had shown to her daughters. The woman who woke up before dawn every single day, effortlessly running a bustling household, now struggles with something as simple as getting dressed.

Watching that change is an emotional burden unlike any other.

This is the same proud woman who raised two daughters to be independent, capable, and strong-willed. She taught us to face life with courage, to learn continuously, and never to lose hope, whatever the circumstances. To see her body gradually give way while her spirit still tries to hold on is difficult to accept.

How does one come to terms with it? You know your time together is limited. Yet knowing that does not make it any easier. Perhaps that is why I find myself treasuring the smallest moments.

The sparkle in her eyes as she enjoys an occasional sugar-free kulfi with the delight of a little child.

The laughter that follows when she mistakes my husband for her grandson.

Her insistence on taking a cold water bath during Margazhi despite everyone's protests.

Her determination to observe Ekadashi fast, even when we gently remind her that she no longer needs to.

There are mood swings. There are stubborn moments too. There are days of frustration for both of us. Caring for an aging parent often feels strangely familiar. In many ways, it resembles taking care of a young child. You remind them to eat. You help them remember names. You persuade them to take their medicines. You celebrate the smallest victories.


Life has a remarkable way of coming full circle. 

As children, our parents held our hands until we were steady enough to walk on our own. One day, almost without warning, the roles reverse. We become the steady hands.

It is not always easy. There are days filled with helplessness, guilt, exhaustion, and quiet tears that no one sees. 

But there is also gratitude. Gratitude that I still have the chance to sit beside her, listen to her stories, smile at her little quirks, and hold her hand. 

One day, these ordinary moments will become the memories I cling to the most.

And perhaps that is the greatest lesson our parents teach us in the final chapter of their lives. Love is not only about being cared for. It is also about having the privilege of caring for the people who once made us feel that nothing in the world could ever harm us.

Wednesday, July 29, 2026

Back to the Long Road

 My first blog post went up in 2003.

That feels almost prehistoric in a world where content appears, trends for a few hours, and disappears before the day is done. Sometimes I joke that I'm a digital dinosaur. Maybe I am. 

Over the years, life has changed in every possible way. My children have grown up. I crossed well into my forties with a few more grey hairs, a little more patience, and a much better sense of what truly matters. 

Every now and then I revisit my old posts. Some make me smile. Some make me cringe. I could edit them. I could quietly delete them. Technology certainly makes that easy.

But I won't.

Those posts are snapshots of who I was at that moment. They capture my excitement, my naivety, my certainty, my doubts. They remind me that growth isn't about rewriting the past. It's about acknowledging it.

These days, life is a different kind of busy. Building a startup, keeping a household running, being there for growing children who need you in new ways, and caring for aging parents... each brings its own joys and its own demands. Some days are overwhelming. Some days are unexpectedly beautiful. Most days are a little bit of both.

Social media has changed the way we tell our stories. X, Instagram, LinkedIn... they're all part of our daily lives now. I enjoy them too. But they often ask for quick thoughts, quick reactions, quick applause.

A blog asks for something else.

It asks you to slow down.

To sit with an idea for a while. To tell the whole story instead of the headline. To write without worrying too much about algorithms or engagement. Maybe nobody reads it. Maybe a handful of people do. Maybe years later, I'll be the one reading it again.

And somehow, that's enough.

So I'm returning to this little corner of the internet. Not because blogging is making a comeback. Not because I have all the answers. Simply because it still feels like home.

If you've wandered in, welcome back. Drop a hello and nudge me to keep this going on. 

There will be stories, observations, a little nostalgia, a little humour, and perhaps a few lessons gathered along the way.

Here's to writing again. 

Tuesday, July 28, 2026

The Illusion of Love

Every Tuesday, Trina brought flowers to work.

Not extravagant bouquets that announced themselves, but small bunches tucked into a clear glass vase. White lilies one week. Pink carnations the next. Once, cheerful yellow tulips that seemed determined to brighten an office lit by fluorescent panels and quarterly targets.

By ten in the morning, someone would invariably wander over to her desk. 

"Fresh flowers again?"
"They're beautiful."
"Where do you find these?"

Trina always looked up with the same warm smile. "They're from the little florist near my apartment."

She never sounded rehearsed, though she must have answered the question fifty times.  

From his desk across the aisle, Shreyas watched these tiny exchanges the way some people watched sunsets. They lasted barely a minute, but somehow managed to leave the office feeling a little lighter.

It wasn't the flowers. It was the ease with which she occupied every space she entered.

---

When Shreyas first joined Arctiq Solutions eighteen months earlier, Trina had been assigned to help him with onboarding.
"Your laptop will refuse to connect to the VPN at least three times this week," she'd said with a grin.

"It already has."

"There you go. You're officially one of us."

He had laughed harder than the joke deserved. Later, he wondered if she had noticed.

Over the next few weeks, he found himself discovering reasons to walk past her desk.

Sometimes he genuinely needed clarification on a project. Sometimes he already knew the answer. She never made anyone feel like they were interrupting her. She listened without glancing at her monitor.

She remembered details people had casually mentioned weeks earlier. 

She laughed easily. When she complimented someone's presentation, it never sounded obligatory.

If someone looked stressed before a client meeting, she'd lean over and whisper something that made them smile. 

There was nothing dramatic about her. No grand gestures. Just hundreds of tiny kindnesses that accumulated quietly.

Or so Shreyas believed.

---

His friends noticed long before he admitted it to himself.

"You're taking the long route to the cafeteria again," Sameer observed one afternoon.

"I'm stretching my legs."

"Your legs only stretch past Trina's desk."

Shreyas rolled his eyes. "You're imagining things."

Sameer took one look at him. "No. You are."

---

The teasing should have embarrassed him. Instead, it gave shape to something he'd been carefully avoiding.  He liked her. Not with the urgency of teenage infatuation. Something gentler.

Something that crept into ordinary days. He found himself noticing details that had nothing to do with work. The tiny silver earrings she wore almost every day. The way she tucked loose strands of hair behind one ear before presenting. The habit of doodling geometric patterns while listening during meetings.

She preferred black coffee. She always removed the lettuce from sandwiches. She never missed wishing people on their birthdays.

He knew all this. Yet he had no idea what books she read. Or whether she cried during sad films.

Or what frightened her. Or what made her angry. 

He mistook familiarity for knowing someone.

---

There were moments that kept the hope alive.

Once, she saved him the last blueberry muffin from the pantry.

"I know you usually come late."  He spent an unreasonable amount of time wondering how she knew his breakfast habits.

Another afternoon, while reviewing a presentation together, she leaned over his chair to point at a chart.

For three glorious seconds, he forgot every word she was saying.

That evening he replayed the moment while brushing his teeth. His reflection looked ridiculous. He laughed at himself.

Then replayed it again.

---

Winter brought annual planning.

Budgets.  Resource allocation. Travel schedules.

Their manager, Vivek, walked into the conference room carrying a printed sheet.

"The Ireland deployment is confirmed."

The room instantly came alive. Two weeks in Dublin to work with the European client. Every engineer secretly hoped for an overseas assignment.

Vivek continued calling out the team.

"Ananya."

"Raghav."

"Trina." Shreyas smiled despite himself.

One more name.

"Shreyas."

For a second he forgot where Ireland was.  He simply knew they'd be spending two weeks together.

---

That evening, Sameer found him reading travel blogs.

"You suddenly seem interested in Irish history?"

"I thought I'd explore."

Sameer peered over his shoulder.

"'Most Romantic Cafés in Dublin.'"

Shreyas quickly switched tabs. "It was...recommended."

"Of course it was." smirked Sameer as he walked away. 

---

The flight was nearly ten hours with a stop in Doha. Trina occupied the aisle seat across from him.

They spoke occasionally. About movies. About jet lag.  About how neither of them had packed enough warm clothes.

Nothing unusual. Nothing that justified the ridiculous optimism blooming inside him.

When the plane finally descended through thick grey clouds, Ireland looked exactly like every postcard he'd ever seen.

Green fields. Stone cottages. Rain.  Endless rain.

"It feels like someone forgot to switch the sky on," Trina said, looking out the window.

He laughed. He had always liked the way she described things.

---

The first crack appeared before they had even left the airport.

An elderly couple stood near the baggage carousel, struggling with two oversized suitcases that refused to come off the belt.

Without thinking, Shreyas walked over.

"Can I help?"

The old man smiled with visible relief.

"Oh, thank you."

Shreyas lifted both cases onto a trolley.

By the time he caught up with his team near immigration, Trina looked mildly impatient.

"There you are."

"Sorry."

"We almost thought you'd disappeared."

"The couple needed help."

She glanced over her shoulder. "Oh."  Then shrugged.

"We should hurry. Immigration queues get horrible."

It wasn't what she said. It was how quickly the moment disappeared from her mind.

Shreyas dismissed the feeling. People reacted differently. That was all.

Or so he told himself.

---


*To be continued...*